;
I love to stay up late not because of computer games or online shopping etc. I just love the silence and calmness in the night. This is the period of time which I know that everybody is sleeping and nobody will be watching, no harsh glares etc. It's the only time when I know I can let myself go, take off the facade and truly be myself for that few hours.
Even until now, I give my trust to people easily, I give my whole heart to treat my friends sincerely. However, many a times people just treat it like dust. Yes! Nobody cherish them. Sometimes, I feel like I am just a mere mannequin, an inanimate object that provides company when it is being needed. Nothing more... Nothing more!
So I use the few hours to take off the mask, and remind myself of whom I am. I realized that if I do not do so, I will lose my self-identity soon...Real soon! So what do I do while immersing myself in the dark?? I would reminiscence. I know we can never turn back time or go back to the past, so yes, I would recall all the pleasant and heartwarming moments spent with everyone.
I always try to relive those moments in my mind because nobody would ever succeed to taint the happy moments that we spent with people around us. You may ask what do I do with those unpleasant ones... I'll try my best to hide them somewhere.
Without fail, in the process of hiding those hurtful memories, it really do not feel good. Well, I can't throw them away because even when memories fade away, they do not disappear and they will always surface again at certain point in time.
Sometimes people seem to not be that bad after all, but in that split second, they would have become complete strangers! I have no idea why, but I am really tired living a life like this...
posted at 2:49 AM
;
Yes! Term break is finally here! This 2 weeks seem so short because of all the assignments and gatherings! Haha =) I'm really looking forward to the Tribe 20 and Ambassadors Christmas gatherings.
Talking about Tribe 20, I must say that these kids always never fail to turn my frowns into smiles. Haha! I went to meet them for pool sessions and dinner few days back. Although not all of us were there, I still enjoyed it very much. Haha!
Went for shopping spree with HueiChin and I have decided what to give the class, ambassadors and the little kiddos already! =) Christmas has always been the motivation that pulled me through every year, I hope this Christmas would be a nice one though. =X
posted at 1:04 AM
