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Tamia - Officially Missing You
Hmm...
Ooh...ooh...
All I hear is raindrops falling on the rooftop
Oh baby, tell me why’d you have to go
‘Cause this pain I feel it won’t go away
And today I’m officially missin’ you
I thought that from this heartache, I could escape
But I’ve fronted long enough to know
There ain’t no way
And today I’m officially missing you
Ooh...can’t nobody do it like you
Said every little thing you do, hey, baby
Said it stays on my mind
And I-I’m officially...
All I do is lay around, 2 years full of tears
From looking at your face on the wall
Just a week ago you were my baby
Now I don’t even know you at all, I don’t know you at all
Well, I wish that you would call me right now
So that I could get through to you somehow
But I guess it’s safe to say, baby, safe to say
that I-I’m officially missin’ you
Ooh...can’t nobody do it like you
Said every little thing you do, hey, baby
Said it stays on my mind
And I-I’m officially
Well, I thought I could just get over you, baby
But I see there’s something I just can’t do
From the way you would hold me
To the sweet things you told me
I just can’t find a way to let go of you
Ooh...can’t nobody do it like you
Said every little thing you do, hey, baby
Said it stays on my mind
And I-I’m officially...
It’s official
Hoo, you know that I’m missin’ you, yeah, yes
All I hear is raindrops, oh, yeah
And I-I’m officially missin’ you
posted at 4:18 PM
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Faith Hill - Cry
If I had just one tear
Running down your cheek
Maybe I could cope
Maybe I'd get some sleep
If I had just one moment at your exspense
Maybe all my misery
Would be well spent...yeaaaa
Could you cry a little
Lie just a little
Pretend that your feeling a little more pain
I gave now I'm wanting
Something in return
So cry just a little for me
If your love could be caged, honey, I would hold the key
And conceal it underneath the pile of lies you handed me
And you'd hunt and those lies
They'd be all you'd ever find
And that'd be all you'd have to know
For me to be fine
And you'd cry a little
Die just a little
And baby I would feel just a little less pain
I gave now I'm wanting
Something in return
So cry just a little for me
Give it up baby
I hear your goodbye
Nothin's gonna save me
I see it in your eyes
Some kind of heartache
Darlin give it a try
I don't want pity
I just want what is mine
Yeah.. Could you cry a little
Lie just a little
Pretend that you're feeling a little more pain
I gave now I'm wanting
Something in return
So cry just a little for me
Cry just a little for me
Could you cry just a little for me?
posted at 4:03 PM
Thursday, April 26, 2007
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I'm trying hard to move on. I'm trying real hard to pick myself up again, without any help this time! It's really tough though. When I'm finally feeling slightly better, things that will rake up the past just pass by me again. They always never fail to make me fall back to the original spot or fall even deeper.
I tried to keep myself away from all sorts of things that will make me fall back, but I can't control your side though. I can't bring myself to tell you not to do those craps and nonsense, but I did drop hints, it's just that you thought those hints were jokes.
I know this contradicts! I know, I really really know! You guys don't have to tell me how stupid or dumb I am, because I know! I know I'll feel more hurt this way, I know I'll take a even longer time to pick myself up this way, but it's even more hurting to bring myself to really keep a distance.
Never mind. At least I know there are friends that will cheer me up when I'm feeling down =)
posted at 2:20 AM
Sunday, April 15, 2007
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People often says that every mistake made, we'll have to live our lives in regret, because they're irreversible. But come to think of it, is there really nothing we can do about it?? Is wallowing and soaking ourselves in depression and misery the only way out when too much hurt is inflicted on us?? Is there really no chances of healing a broken heart??
Nothing is impossible because I M POSSIBLE =) When there's a will, there's a way!!(",) For the above questions, the answer is they're not true!! It's true that once we commit a mistake, consequences that lead to it do make us feel regretful and there's nothing like turn back time.
But we can always do things to make up to the mistake we commited. Do something about it to change things to the better, why dwell in regrets when you can actually live out of it if you do something about it, right?? =)
Same for sinking into depression! Yes, the amount of pain everyone goes through is different. Nobody will know the hurt you're going through better than you do. Nobody will ever understand fully how hurt you are because they're not the one that went through the situation like you did. Even if the same situation were to hit another person, the reaction and feelings involved will be diffferent because you're you, nobody can ever be like you. You're unqiue =)
But why sink into depression when you know your smile would mean the whole world to someone out there. You might not know, but someone might have fallen in love and can't do without your smile(",) I'm sure many of you heard the story about a smile that saved the suicidal thought of a young child.
In fact, sinking into depression is because you are wallowing in self-pity! You find that you're given unfair treatment by someone dear to you. Yes, you can feel unfair, but why take revenge on yourself?? Isn't that very silly?? Someone had hurt you so deeply but you end up hurting yourself even more??
Look beyond the hurt and you'll learn many precious lessons. Want to take revenge on those that had hurt you deeply?? There's a good way. Be nice to those that hurt you because you won't feel bad but they do!!(",)
Never take revenge on yourself, and of course never take revenge on others. You know why?? It's tiring to hate someone, what's more to plot a revenge against them. You know the hurt you been through, why pass it on to another person right?? =) So..wallowing in your feelings is just simply self-pitying, it's not good after all(",)
Who says nothing can heal a broken heart??!! This is certainly not true. Yes! There will be scars no matter how hard you try to salvage the heart, but the scars are reminder for you not to commit the same mistake ever again. If there scars are not there, how would you ever remember all the precious experiences you went through?? Then how is it possible to prevent you for committing the same mistake ever again??
There're many scars inflicted on everyone's heart. But the scars will never be the same(",) Pick yourself up after a fall. How?? By falling again!! But let the scar from the previous fall reminds you not to fall the same way as you did the previous times =)
posted at 12:55 PM
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Most of us often lead such a quick-paced life that we hardly slow down to appreciate the surroundings or even to even look at things we're walking past. We often just focus on the things we want to see or obvious enough to be seen, the destiny we're heading towards or the goal we're striving for, that we so often neglect the beautiful things happening around us.
Take for example a student. We take the same route to school almost everyday, but do we often know exactly what is along that route?? ASk students who take the same route what had they seen along the way, many of them give the same answers like trees, cars! Now, here's an analogy! A boy needs to walk through a forest before he can get home. Everyday without fail he would walk through the same forest, but everyday, fifty trees are being chopped off. However, the little boy didn't notice any difference until one day when he was walking home, he thought he got lost because the forest area around his house had been cleared.
This is how sad life can get! We always just focus on getting things done quickly that we often lose attention on the other important things around us like friends, family, love etc. until we lose them one by one! Now, why not slow down your pace and take a break! Start observing things around you and you'll even realise the slightest difference that happens at home, like this is the pencil marking I used to mark my height! Now I had grown so tall! =)
Don't just look at things you want to see or things that are obvious enough to be seen. Look beyond it, and you're see a nicer and clearer picture of life! =) you have to have the patience at times to wait for the best answer! Do not rush for things that are worth waiting! For instance, mimosa are just plants that grow among the grass. If you walk so quickly, you might not even have notice that they do bear pink flowers! =) Give everything time because good stuff are worth the wait(",)
In life, everyone will have their turn to be taken granted for! Come to think of it, instead of being depressed that someone took you for granted, why not look at it this way that there's someone out there that you took for granted too??(",)
Same logic, we're so focus on our aims that we often neglect the most important things in our lives. Perharps the person who took you for granted has fixed his/her eyes too closely to the things he/she wanted and didn't felt your importance at the time because you were always there for him/her no matter no or shine! Hence, it's only after your absence did he/she felt the difference because you are no longer there to provide him/her the shelter she had always been under!
This is a common mistake for everyone! Forgive and forget and things will be so much easier. Why feel taken granted for when we know we're the willing party that wanted to give our loved ones like family friends lovers etc the best that we could??!! It's a blessing that you're able to give, count yourselves! Ever heard before, it's more blessed to give than to receive?? =)
For a reason or another, humans always tell lies! Even if it's white lie, it's still a lie after all =) But did we ever realise?? We can fool the rest, but we can't fool ourselves. Yes! So always remember to be truthful to ourselves because we have to face the real us before we can change and evolve to a better us =)
Many people often try to get opinions from others before they make any decisions. But did we ever realise that there's already a decision in our mind before we asked them for opinions?? So what are opinions exactly for?? They're just what others think, feel or react to the particular situation.
Sometimes if possible, especially for matters close to heart, it's best that you listen to what your heart wants and follow it. Focus on the situation, list out the pros and cons and you weight them yourselves which side is heavier! You know what you want, but you also know it best what is best for you! That's when you decide whether you want to follow your heart(desires/hope/dreams) or your mind(the practical and logical solutions to your problem)
Friends are just there to guide you along the way. They are people who helps you develop your mind in planning for a better solutions. Keep in mind that nobody knows you better than yourselves. Decisions are still yours to make! Think carefully before you make any choice because you wouldn't want to lead a life filled with any regrets and you can't blame anyone for the consequences, because after all, it's you who made the choice =)
posted at 4:04 AM
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Just came home not long ago after stoning, came online and talked to people who are still online. Yeap, although it's weird being there, but I still attended the celebration. When I reached, it was just in time for photo-taking and cake-cutting, but still upon arrival, we were given such a warm welcome!
Took the group photo, talked for awhile and off we went. Yes, it was a memorable farewell too! Jiaen went home and I went to look for clemmy angel in the seashell at Esplanade! That's when two kids started playing with elmo =)
We sat at near the water!!(",) Both had a fun time sharing and listening!! Guess what!! We started playing with water and this woman came and approach us for phototaking service =) We had a hard time understanding what the lady was trying to say, but we did enjoy ourselves doing retarded actions. Haha!! =X
The lady showed us the pictures taken and MY GOODNESS!! I realised how shag and tired I look. Haha!! Supposed to be nice photos but haix..Too tired lah! Haha!! =) Then the lady asked so many funny things about us. Funniest thing was she even tried to infer our characters, but I think she's quite right about our character but she got the wrong idea though. Haha!! =X
Off we went for a walk and went for supper!! It's home sweet home after all, at least for him =)
P.S: The lasy told me a secret about kuku..Haha!! Interesting one though =)
posted at 3:42 AM
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Actually I'm really very touched and felt so guilty towards my parents. This is the first time they left me at home alone for such a long period of time, so i guess they were equally worried as I am.
We had our family dinner just now before I left for the party. Everyone took a seat except my mum. She was busy roaming around the house trying to do her best to make sure everything is in place for me.
First, she started early in the afternoon packing my room, changing the bed covers and stuff. Reminding me that I have to separately wash coloured clothes and white shirts. Off she went to the kitchen, clearing all the products that might turn back if I never use them because she was afraid that they will start smelling and I won't know how to wash off the smell.
She boiled and filled up 5 bottles of 1.5L of water to put in the fridge because she knows that I only take cold drinks. She also replenish shampoo, soap and stuff for me, being afraid I might not know where she kept them. She even replenished tissue boxes for me.
Argh!! Then she reminded me to buy milk when they run out because she knows I won't eat before going out or in fact I won't eat at home. Haha! Haix.
My emotions are like toads jumping up and down and making lots of noises within me. Haix! Everything seems so unsettled and I'm really in a lost. Haha!! =X
posted at 3:12 AM
Saturday, April 14, 2007
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Woke up very early to prepare myself to go to the bank to settle some paper work with my sister. Off we went to NP to get the laptop stuff done, but guess what, it's close??!! Wasted a trip there but treated my sister to a meal at MACS =)
Naggings for wasting her time on the way to macs. She had to go back home to settle her stuff so we went on separate ways. I took this empty bus and suddenly a freaky old indian man came and sit beside me. There were so many empty seats but he chose to sit beside me is already freakying me out!
He started to sit closer and closer, his arms touching my arms, so I took my bag and placed it in between our seats so at least there's abit of distance??!! Then he started to stare at me! That's the time I cannot stand it! Hair started standing and I was really hoping for a saviour!
Prayed real hard he won't do anything funny. Guess what!! He started to bend down and dunno do what kuku stunts lah! I was wearing skirt, so I quickly take my jacket out and cover! Haha!
Then this old uncle came to my rescue by scolding him and asking him to move to the back seats. Haha! It was really frightening! Reminded me of unpleasant incident that happened when I was in secondary school. Hmmmm! Maybe that's why I over-reacted? But which girl won't be freaked out when this is like happening to them. Never mind. It's me, my own reaction =)
Parents leaving with my uncle in a few hours time. It's the first time I'm feeling lost without them. Maybe it's because this time round they'll be away for real long and I really have to survive on my own. Worried for my uncle's operation too. I hope it will go on smoothly.
Supposed to be at LiJun's 21st birthday party already, but I decided to stay at home for dinner with them before going. I won't know what the future holds, so I better cherish this chance to have dinner with them, especially my uncle. It might be the last meal I can have with him, there might be more to come. I really don't know.
He's worried, I know. But right now, he's happily talking to my family in the living room, joking and laughing all the way. Sudden silence might occur but new topics will be created. I can feel the tension there, that's why I can online to blog.
Blogging helps to release some of my stress because I know there are so many of you out there reading, and I know you guys are always here for me =) Hmmmm. My uncle's behaviour now really reflects my own attitude.
Always smiling, laughing and joking away when deep inside me, there's always this bit of me being so worried, lost or depressed. Always putting up that smile when I'm with my friends so they won't have to worry much. Always hiding and holding back my tears when I'm with my friends so they won't be worried if I'll still be sobbing when I reach home.
Seriously, I'm starting to have tears rolling in my eyes now. Haha! Looking at the time nearing for them to leave, the more worried I get. I'm afraid of things that will happen when they leave. I'm afraid I can't handle things on my own when they're not around. I know this is what I have always wanted, to be independant and not rely on them, but that's because I know no matter what happens, I still have them to fall on.
But now, it's different. I really have to depend on myself now. The last month without them was bad enough, now it's three to six months! Well, no choice after all. I won't want them to be back so soon because it'll mean another tragedy that my uncle had left us?? Hmmmm. I'm really confused inside out.
It'll be another feeling when I go for the birthday celebration later. It'll be a broken promise if I didn't go, so of course I'll certainly pop by and wish her a Happy Birthday.
Although it's just an hour that I'll be staying over there, but it's the thought at heart that counts. it's the presence there not the duration that counts too. =)
Whatever it is, I won't stay there and look at how fake some people can get. I won't want to stay there and start listening to all the craps that some of them will say. I won't want to stay there and look at how hypocritical people really are, because I know the truth, I won't see things lying in this way.
So I better take my leave before I start to confront you about everything and destroy the party or something. I'm praying real hard now that you won't show me any attitude when I leave earlier or say anything because you know that if you ever do, I'll really shoot the truth at you this time round.
In fact, wanted to get someone else to go with me, so I can have excuse to leave earlier. However, I have totally no idea who to bring alone, so i guess. Hmmmm! It's going to be alright.
posted at 6:13 PM
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I'm back to blog again =) Watched the movie
Before the show start, there was this thriller about Spiderman. From there I gained an inspiring quote! It goes something like -Heros are given a chance to face darkness or be consumed by it- Nice isn't it??
All of us are heros in our own lives. Problems and obstacles are just like darkness invading our life, taking away our bright future!! =) But you know what?? We have a choice, but we all know the best is just to face it rather than to escape from it, because we know we can't escape from reality =) Remember there's always a light at the end of every tunnel =)
Now the movie! Seeing how people plot against each other, killing each other, hiding their ugly selves with terrible methods, really pains my heart! At points of the movie I felt like crying, heartaching like mad!
Although it's just a movie, but it's matters so close to our hearts! Maybe it's just not murders, but backstabbing or even trying to tarnish other's reputation. People now still tries to cover up their wrong-doings with lies or even trying to let others pay the price for them.
Betrayal was also featured in the movie. But in the show I learnt this too. It's through betrayal that we learn our lessons and realise who are the ones who we can trust and fall on =) So behind every unhappiness, there's always something great we gain..No pain, no gain!(",)
Conclusion, everyone single person that pass by your life is important! Your family for bringing you up to see this wonderful world, your friends who brought joy and laughters, buddies who are always there no matter rain or shine, people who hurt you so deeply because they let you learnt and grow alot! Teachers who taught us all the valuable knowledge, even a little kid that walk pass you with a lovely smile that brightens up your day =)
Give thanks for everyone who left their footprints in your life =)
posted at 12:33 AM
Friday, April 13, 2007
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Last night was the earliest night I went to bed! Reason being I had to wake up early in order to meet Esabel to go for FMS One-Day Orientation, and of course I cannot stand two people bugging me so off i went to bed =X Just joking =)
Guess what, I fell asleep at around 1230 because I learnt a new way of relaxing your mind to allow yourself to fall asleep easier! =) However, got woken up several times by stunting messages of this kuku guy. It's just too bad, I doubt I'll accept him because I don't want to be digging my own grave. Haha!
Slept only for a few hours and off I am to school with Esabel. Two blur sotongs losing their way in our new school campus. Asked around for direction and seniors lead us to a totally opposing way??!! It's then when we freaked out and a lecturer came by and provided us the right direction!! =)
Bump into quite alot of PL-Lites along the way. Although we are split into different courses and classes, but I made new friends! Chloe, XinYi, Dawn and many more (",) I'm sure the class will get lively soon! =)
After orientation was another round of orientation by clemmy angel in a seashell!!~~ Hahaha!! =) Brought me to print my timetable and getting my books. I felt like some primary kids though, being so blur at some obvious stuff. Haha!! =P
After that, went to explore outside school area!!~~ Weet!!~~ This is the most fun orientation i ever attended!! Thanks dude!! Sushi treat at Holland Village's Sushi Tei!! Choc Frap with cream treat at town!! Movie <
Oh yes!! Chloe having the same phone as me as well! Haha! Cool isn't it =) Anyway, swapped phone with kuku clem before we went home because he wanted the black phone?? Hahaha!! Funny guy lah.. But yes!! It's a happy day!!~~
posted at 11:29 PM
Thursday, April 12, 2007
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梁 咏 琪- 原 来 爱 情 这 么 伤
我 睁 开 眼 睛 却 感 觉 不 到 天 亮
东 西 吃 一 半 莫 名 其 妙 哭 一 场
我 忍 住 不 想 时 间 变 得 更 漫 长
也 与 你 有 关 否 则 又 开 始 胡 思 乱 想
我 日 月 无 光 忙 得 不 知 所 以 然
找 朋 友 交 谈 其 实 全 帮 不 上 忙
以 为 会 习 惯 有 你 在 才 是 习 惯
你 曾 住 在 我 心 上 现 在 空 了 一 个 地 方
原 来 爱 情 这 么 伤 比 想 象 中 还 难
泪 水 总 是 不 听 话 幸 福 躲 起 来 不 声 不 响
太 多 道 理 太 牵 强 道 理 全 是 一 样
说 的 时 候 很 简 单 爱 上 后 却 正 巧 打 乱
我 日 月 无 光 忙 得 不 知 所 以 然
找 朋 友 交 谈 其 实 全 帮 不 上 忙
以 为 会 习 惯 有 你 在 才 是 习 惯
你 曾 住 在 我 心 上 现 在 空 了 一 个 地 方
原 来 爱 情 这 么 伤 比 想 象 中 还 难
泪 水 总 是 不 听 话 幸 福 躲 起 来 不 声 不 响
太 多 道 理 太 牵 强 道 理 全 是 一 样
说 的 时 候 很 简 单 爱 上 后 却 正 巧 打 乱
只 想 变 的 坚 强
强 到 能 够 去 忘
无 所 谓 悲 伤
只 要 学 会 抵 抗
原 来 爱 情 这 么 伤
原 来 爱 情 是 这 样
这 样 峰 回 路 转
泪 水 明 明 流 不 干 瞎 了 眼 还 要 再 爱 一 趟
有 一 天 终 于 打 完 思 念 的 一 场 战
回 过 头 再 看 一 看 原 来 爱 情 那 么 伤
下 次 还 会 不 会 这 样
posted at 10:40 PM
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阿沁 - 其实还爱你
我 讨 厌 阴 天 的 风
冷 得 那 么 刺 痛 每 一 夜 闭 上 眼 睛
只 有 你 能 够 抚 平 所 有 的 寂 寞
昨 天 的 风 筝 在 角 落
被 谁 丢 到 了 路 口
我 很 不 想 让 你 找 到 离 开 的 理 由
每 一 夜 闭 上 眼 睛
我 看 到 了 恶 梦
你 微 笑 但 是 旁 边 的 人 不 是 我
天 空 切 开 一 道 裂 缝
直 接 割 到 我 心 中
不 想 装 作 脆 弱
也 不 想 爱 得 懦 弱
其 实 我 非 常 爱 你 不 想 失 去 你
难 道 我 没 有 权 利 说 我 不 愿 意
你 给 了 他 的 吻
虽 然 只 有 余 温
可 知 道 我 多 渴 望 抓 住 你 的 心
我 知 道 他 很 爱 你 你 怕 他 伤 心
我 每 天 假 装 开 心 害 怕 你 离 去
可 不 可 以 任 性 求 求 你 不 要 去
藏 在 我 心 里 最 后 一 句 其 实 还 爱 你
每 一 夜 闭 上 眼 睛
我 看 到 了 恶 梦
你 微 笑 但 是 旁 边 的 人 不 是 我
天 空 切 开 一 道 裂 缝
直 接 割 到 我 心 中
不 想 装 作 脆 弱
也 不 想 爱 得 懦 弱
其 实 我 非 常 爱 你 不 想 失 去 你
难 道 我 没 有 权 利 说 我 不 愿 意
你 给 了 他 的 吻
虽 然 只 有 余 温
可 知 道 我 多 渴 望 抓 住 你 的 心
我 知 道 他 很 爱 你 你 怕 他 伤 心
我 每 天 假 装 开 心 害 怕 你 离 去
可 不 可 以 任 性 求 求 你 不 要 去
藏 在 我 心 里 最 后 一 句 其 实 还 爱 你
可 不 可 以 任 性 求 求 你 不 要 去
藏 在 我 心 里 最 后 一 句 其 实 还 爱 你
posted at 7:06 PM
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-645am- *Rolling around my bed* Started to feel really tired after working out my brain for so long, thinking of the things that happened since young, especially those things that are such wonderful memories.
Most of the flashbacks were the memories of you though, all the sweet old times we had chatting, hanging out together with the other two girls! Then this sudden thought that I should go online since I cannnot fall asleep came into my mind. However, I fell asleep after all the tears. I must admit, it's really tiring to play with elmo!
I guess I was so tired that I only woke up at 150pm, when sun started to really shine on my face! Haha!
-May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the ass of the person who screws up your day and may his arms grow too short to scratch his ass! Gd morning=) -
A message that brought smile to my face straight after I woke up. Haha! Quickly, I washed myself up and I got so stunt when I looked in the mirror! Haha! My eyes were like puffer fish! Wanted to turn around and quickly rushed back into my room but I bumped into my mum.
She gave me a stunt look and asked what's wrong with my eyes. Haha! It's then that I knew the amount of tears shed last night! =) Off I went into my room and started to do blog-hopping, surt the net and chatting with people.
Saw messages sent to me when I went offline. Sweet messages like, u know you could have called me last night, i would have answered your call u know =), i will always be your frend ya...so no fear of imposing, buddies for life, hey gal are you feeling better, you know you have us around yea! Again it was all these messages that brought smile to me!(",)
Thanks alot my dear friends =) All the little concern cheered me up a little(",) Went to read clemmy seashell's blog and saw a very inspiring post. "The bungee rope are all the encouragements and friends who provided all the support, during this period of time." All my friends here, you guys are like the bungee rope tied strongly to me. Thanks for pulling me back whenever I fall from a great height =)
After that, saw his nick and went to read his blog. Woah! Disappointment again. Told Jiaen about it and she started screaming over msn. Haha! But I have nothing to say as well. You know I'll still keep my promise to be there whenever you need me. You know I'll still keep my promise to listen whenever you're down. You know I'll keep my promise to be there when you feel like crying. But I doubt you'll even remember that you still have these promises with me. I guess, when you really need someone, you won't even remember having us, this group of friends who helped you along for the past few months.
Listening to songs and tears welling up in my eyes when the lyrics hit me at the right spot. Heh! =) I'm glad that I'm able to shed tears again. It was so terrible last time when your heart is aching so badly that sometimes you even find it so hard to breathe, but no matter how hard you try, but tears just can't seems to be squeezed out! That was also the period of time when it seems that I'm numb to almost everything.
If something happens, I know I feel the pain, but I seem to be numb towards it because it just don't seems that serious compared to what I went through?? Something like you lost a precious gift which only cost $1, then you realised that you lost your wallet the next day, you feel the pain, but it can't be compared to the pain of losing that precious gift althought it only costed $1.
I have no idea how to express it out, but whatever it is, try to understand it if you can, or else just forget about it. I don't even know what I'm feeling exactly. Haha! =) A smile after I woke up and that's it. Off I went to play with elmo again!!~~ =(
posted at 2:56 PM
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
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Vivian - 好 眼 泪 坏 眼 泪
我 曾 认 真 深 爱 著 一 个 人
他 给 我 幸 福 的 可 能
我 等 我 问 未 来 何 时 发 生
他 只 是 给 我 一 个 吻
快 乐 我 哭 是 因 为 你 的 手
曾 答 应 带 我 向 前 走
难 过 我 哭 是 因 为 我 的 手
找 不 到 你 说 的 以 後
好 眼 泪 坏 眼 泪
我 都 曾 为 你 流
感 动 和 悲 伤 都 是 理 由
只 不 过 在 你 不 再 爱 我 了 以 後
像 坏 的 眼 泪 慢 慢 流
快 乐 我 哭
是 因 为 我 付 出 得 到 你 温 柔 的 答 覆
难 过 我 哭 是 因 为 我 认 输
你 的 心 永 远 留 不 住
好 眼 泪 坏 眼 泪
我 都 曾 为 你 流
感 动 和 悲 伤 都 是 理 由
只 希 望 在 我 不 再 想 你 了 之 後
有 好 的 眼 泪 慢 慢 流
好 眼 泪 坏 眼 泪
我 都 曾 为 你 流
感 动 和 悲 伤 都 是 理 由
只 希 望 在 我 不 再 想 你了之後
有 好 的 眼 泪 慢 慢 流
有 好 的 笑 容 陪 著 我
posted at 10:45 PM
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I woke up early today and decided to stay home to do some reflections. Stayed in my room and started to dig things out from every corner. Firstly was letters! Reading letters one by one really bring me back to old times and remind me of some close friends that I had lost contact with.
Although I felt some disappointment having to lose contact with those wonderful friends, but at least I managed to keep wonderful memories! Letters from primary school friends reminded me of the innocent period of school life! All the cheeky stuff we used to do. Girls ganging up to fight with the guys at basketball court after school, having to bluff our parents to go out together, having a bonded class where we all treated each other like real brothers and sisters etc. To be honest, I'm really glad that I'm still being able to be in contact with most of my primary school friends!
Letters from secondary school friends! Comparing them with the letters i read just now, really shows that secondary school was really a huge jump from primary school! Reading the letters really reminded me of seniors who had always been around me to guide and advice me, juniors who had always been ever so supportive of every decision made, and of course peers who had always been standing by to help and lend their hands! I'm proud to say I'm still in contact with almost all my secondary school friends! =) Even seniors who had graduated 3 years ago!(",)
Then i started to look at msn conversations that I saved, sms that are still kept in my phone, email in my inbox, now I have new group of friends who are always there for me when I needed someone to talk to, someone to lean on!
Most of all, the important lesson I learnt through this first session of reflection is that since young, everyone already started to have different kind of problems! Every period that we go through, there's bound to be obstacles that we have to overcome.
God has His plan for us long before we were brought to this world! Every little problem is in His plan for us. Every problem He put us through is a test of our faith.
Everytime we look back at our past and ask, why is there only a set of footprint?? I thought God promised that He'll never let us walk alone and He'll always go through our difficult times with us?? Yes!! There's only one set of footprints because He kept His promise, He carried us through our most difficult times, that's why you only see one set of footprints! Those footprints belong to Him! =)
Everytime when we're feeling sad or lost, we start looking around us but find that we're all alone, and we'll start asking I thought God will never leave me?? Yes!! He didn't and will never leave us alone. He just kept to His promise and went ahead of us to make our paths clear!
Sometimes when we're feeling down and helpless, we wonder why is it friends around us and we can't feel Him. You know why?? It's because those friends around us are sent by God to do His work! That's why we always hear people saying that friends are God-sent angels in our lives =)
It's today that I finally understand this. Looking back in my life, everytime when I fall, there's always someone by my side! I'm glad for all the friends out there! No matter what, once a friend, friends forever =)
Secondly, I went on to look at photos! From young till now, I realised i really grew and changed alot! At least changed to someone who has more confidence in herself. I used to be even worst than now, scared of every little thing, at least now it's not so bad! However I must admit that I'm still a coward!! Haha!!
Never mind. I'm sure I'll continue to grow. Looking at the pictures and I realised I didn't complain of anything like last time! This is because I learnt that "I wanna stay the way I am, and be who I wanna be!" *Thanks dude!*
A nice quote to share :
If you are ham and cheese, i am the sandwhich, squeeze u in between the mayo and tomatoes, once someone takes a bite into the sandwhich, the teeth sure bite into me first la, but when the mouth close part of the ham cheese sandwhich mayo and tomatoes all inside his mouth, yum yum, so u are not alone inside the mouth, i also inside also!
posted at 6:07 PM
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Yesterday night was rather nice for me =) Straight after I went home, had a quick washed up and I started to surf the net and chat online. As usual, talked to my dear girl. Soon after he pop by to help his friend to advertise! I see now, other than helping your friends you have nothing better to talk to us about yea?? Due to this reason, I started playing with elmo for the night!
Thank God that whenever I start playing with elmo, he would always send people who can cheer me up or people who can give some words to help me!(",) For last night, God sent me Jiaen and Clemmy seashell! =)
My dear girl has her way of making me feel better with her blurness, helping me to vent my anger by scolding with me! Haha! Nevertheless, her advice!!(",) Thanks alot my dear girl, for always being there for me no matter what! You know you mean alot to me =)
As for clemmy seashell, he always have his own way of cheering me up with his overflowing of lemon juice eh(",) Always giving encouragement in a shooting manner..Wahahaha!! But must say the way he say things is rather nice!!~~ Weet!!~~ I found someone who can be my partner to put words across in a nice way..Hahaha!!
After talking to the both of them, I felt so much better! At least they made me forget about him at the moment!(",) Then kuku clemmy seashell came up with this BRIGHT idea but refused to tell me. After awhile my phone started ringing, I thought which kuku called me at such a time with PRIVATE number still.
Answer is clemmy seashell! Haha! We joked, pour lemon juice on each other and we started to play with elmo when we started sending each other songs?! Haha!! Time seems to pass so shortly and when the piggy went off to sleep, I realised we had been talking for an hour! Haha!
Then started to talk to Jiaen and got quite emo at a point of time when we read someone's blog. We just don't understand how can some people get over things so easily! We want to be like one of them, but no matter how hard we try, we just can't!
Haix! Lousy me!!~~ I just can't seems to take things lightly especially when it comes to relationship stuff! For example, I like him but I don't even dare to let him know. Haha! Coward right?! I know, you don't have to tell me, I know myself jolly well! I'm a coward when it comes to such things!
Never mind. With the way he's treating the group of us now, the feeling is starting to fade! Yeap. Anyway, when I got to know the real side of him, I had already told myself to give up. Haha! Finally after some time it's starting to fade. So I guess I'm going to be alright soon!
Then I'll be free from a major problem! After which I can be the happy me again! =)
posted at 3:52 PM
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
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Cary - 世界唯一的你
是你
第一眼我就 认出来
这是命 运最美的安排
是我
让你越过漫长的等待
我们只要 现在深 爱幸福就 来
恨我 来不及参于你的过去
抱歉 让 你等待
我愿意付出一切交 换
我灵魂的另一半
这个世界唯一的 你
是我 拥有的奇 迹
对我说的一字一句
都是我 们的秘密
紧紧拥 抱唯一的 你
无可救 药的坚定
就算世界 与我为敌
我也愿意我什 么都愿意
看开过去所有的悲哀
都只是 寻觅 我唯一勇敢
真爱
照亮了漆黑的夜 晚
寻找了一次一辈子
再不分开
恨我来不及参于你的过去
抱歉 让你等待
我愿意付出一切交 换
我灵魂的另一半
呜...耶....
是一个奇迹
对我说的一字一句
都是我 们的秘密
紧紧拥 抱唯一的 你
无可救 药的坚定
就算世界 与我为敌
我也愿意我什 么都愿意....
呜...哦...
我愿意付出一切交 换
我灵魂的另一半
ho ...哦...
就算 让我伤尽天理我什 么都愿意
为你紧紧拥 抱唯一的 你
无可救 药的坚定
就算世界 与我为敌
我也愿意我什 么都愿意
posted at 11:12 PM
;
I woke up quite late today, so decided to skip my meal again! Washed myself up and started using the desktop. I gave this private blog link to a wrong person. I guess maybe I was still in the sleeping mode, so the brain couldn't function properly. Haha!
Never mind. I guess no harm opening up this blog now, just that he cannot come to know about it because I don't intend to let him know about all these. Hee! Yes. You can call me silly if you want, because I know I'm one when it comes to this kind of things.
It's alright because I'm growing up! At least going through all these had given me the ability to understand what others are going through sometimes, hence being able to give better words. At least I'm speaking from my heart and not just saying things for the sake of consoling or helping!
Anyway, had a nice chat with clemmy seashell before going out to meet Esabel. Now, I have clearer answer to those questions that had been ringing in my head! I'm glad to have friends like you people here who are reading this blog. Thanks for always reading my private blog and start to talk to me and giving me those valuable thoughts and answer(",)
Met up with my dear girl and we started roaming around SimLim. We both bought things and we started to hate MAC laptop alot! Haha! Suddenly I'm starting to regret to choose to enter mass communication. Never mind, I'm sure God has His plan for me =)
Anyway, it feels just like the past, it's always so relaxing to hang around her! Hey girl, I love you lots!!(",)
Here is a nice answer that answers to a question that I'm sure alot of us had been asking ourselves(",)
Clemmy Seashell says:
Q : why can't i apply what i say to others on myself?
words are so easily given away but the actions that are attached to them are painful lessons. That part would have to die to be reborn again, when u are going to live you life without any regrets. If you ever have the chance to turn back time, would you do anything differently?..=) i know i would not, because if i did there would be a different outcome and i know that is not me anymore. you might want time to pass ever so quickly, so the pain, hurt and regrets would move on, but to really feel hurt that you do now is how you really grow. No use brooding on past mistakes, no use thinking on things that would hurt u even more. when life gets u down, do not mellow on the past on how u could have done things differently but how u can make ur future better !!! going thru this phase is not easy, but it was by chance that God sent an angel who is going thru the same pain u are going thru. also coincidental that this kuku angel got the same phone on the same day as this kuku face child
posted at 8:50 PM
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Janice Wei Lan - Never Let You Go
The rain just never seems to bring the joy, I feel the same,
Everlasting pain of my loss remains,
My heart can't seem to learn to part,
The hold you left your mark,
All that I dreamed of now it seem so stark,
Though I told myself, won't hold my breath,
A part of me was dying,
There is nothing left for me to do now, but give in,
*Chorus
If you gave me one chance to tell you how I was feeling,
I would sing to you and tell you I won't live my life without you,
If you gave me one chance to tell you how I was feeling,
I would hold your hand and look in your eyes,
And you know I'd never let you go.
The way you left me on the train,
I don't know what to say,
I remember everything of that day,
I can't believe we'd never dance,
I just need one more chance,
To share the sunset,Our one last romance,
Though I told myself, won't hold my breath,
A part of me was dying,
There is nothing left for me to do now but give in,
If you gave me one chance to tell you how I was feeling,
I would sing to you and tell you I won't live my life without you,
If you gave me one chance to tell you how I was feeling,
I would hold your hand and look in your eyes,
And you know I'd never let you go.
If you gave me one chance to tell you how I was feeling,
I would sing to you and tell you I won't live my life without you,
If you gave me one chance to tell you how I was feeling,
I would hold your hand and look in your eyes,
And you know I'd never let you go
posted at 1:57 PM
Monday, April 9, 2007
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Today was a nice and lovely day! I woke up very early and started to surf the net. I went on blog hopping today and realised that the cyber world is getting more and more dead. Haha! I kept watch of time because I didn't wanted to be late to meet Abigail and Esabel.
It's been so long since I last met up with these 2 girls. We always text each other to request for meet up, but in the end, we'll always delay or postpond! Finally we are meeting up today, of course I was jumping for joy. Haha!
We went for dinner at Sakae sushi and we started shopping around town. After which we went to bugis street, had some small talks and we headed home! A short catching up session, but a nice and lovely one!
Before I went to meet the girls, I had a chat with Clement(Shocked that I know your full name?? =p) (",) He's a nice guy I just got to know recently =) In fact, he's my "God bestowed Angel"! Haha! Someone always trying to cheer me up with jokes and shooting me when he sense something's wrong with me. Thanks dude!
However, today was little child's turn to listen to the angel. Actually, I felt the pain too because I went through this period of time of trying to pick myself up after a terrible fall. Instead, I'm trying to do that now!
Read his blog, saw the things he said made me felt touched but also confused. Why am I always helping others out, telling them nice words BUT i just can't seems to say those to myself? Why can't I apply what I say to others on myself?
Yeah.I'm beginning to play with elmo and being emo now.What to do? I'm just plain useless, just another useless emotional freak living on this world, wasting the earth's resources! Sometimes I really wish that I have stronger legs so I won't fall so easily. Just my luck.
posted at 11:55 PM
Saturday, April 7, 2007
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I have no idea why is everyone telling me about all their problems tonight. I'm feeling so emotional now! Tears welling up in my eyes, but there's nothing that I can do about it. Talk to someone? Blogging it out? How to do all these when I'm feeling totally lost and confuse. I just can't find the right words to express how I feel. That's also one major problem that I'm facing now!
Firstly,I guess you're one person that I really thank God for letting me know you. You were someone I knew by mistake, a beautiful accidental to me. When I'm facing problems and can't turn to anyone because of one reason or another,you were always there to listen and cheer up me.
To you,you might felt that you didn't do much for me because you weren't good at your words, but seriously, you played an important part in my life when I was trying hard to pick myself up when I fell so seriously back then.
Thanks for helping me up, teaching and guiding me to start walking again. You might have the same thoughts as me sometimes, why I trusted you so much. It's because you shared your problems with me, so I told you mine too. It was supposed to be an exchange, and we thought it's much easier talking in this way since we don't know who's over at the other screen.
After all, we finally meet up and had a fun day and you knew my other friends too. I was super glad that we can all click so well. In the past, every little small thing can let you know how I'm feeling, but now, even if it's obvious you treat it as you don't know anything I suppose.
Knowing that you're not feeling great and asked you about it, all you did was started joking about it again. It really breaks my heart sometimes. Where are all the words that you had given to me? Why bother to make promises when you know that you can't keep?
Secondly, I'm afraid! Now is my down period. It means that I'll fall easily too. Please.. Dear God, let me stay strong this time round. I really do not hope to fall and commit any mistake that I'll regret for life.
Lastly, having so many problems but I can't even turn to someone I used to depend alot on in the past. She might be having her very own problem, hope she'll be doing fine too.
posted at 11:18 AM
Monday, April 2, 2007
;
Leslie called me just now, someone who had never called me before. Guess what's the reason to call me!! Out of concern to check if I'm still taking My Voice and wanted to ask me down to MG to sing. How interesting yea?? I bet readers here should know what I mean by interesting.Haha!!
It was the first time I felt so pressurized to go town. First, visited Alan, took a whole bag of free chocolates!!! Wooohoooo(",) Thanks dude..Haha!! =) Then went off to grab some stuff to get ready for school reopen. Met up with Alan, Augustine for lunch..Haha!! Thanks dude for the drinks!!(",) Off we went..trying our best not to bump into certain peeps.
Unforfunately, bump into so many of them and we had no choice but to go back there. Felt so uneasy because I no longer have a sense of belonging there. Returning there now just feels like a total stranger, whatever..Really feels weird there!
When we don't go back, people often ask about our change of attitude due to the sudden MIA-ING..But COME ON!!~~ When we go back, what kind of attitude you guys show us??!! Haix.. No comments..
Too many things had been happening, shall stop blogging about the past.. I'll be back to blog more often..Hee
posted at 9:05 PM
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Now I'm blogging using my own desktop. It's been such a long time since I surf the net using my own desktop becaused something went wrong with the connection and stuff. However, I lost all my precious documents and photographs thanks to my sister who reformatted the computer without my permission!
Maybe you all must be scolding me for being ungrateful, but she rushed to repair the desktop because she wanted to use it. I'm like so...No comments! Just felt so pissed off. Feel so irritated in this family sometimes. Everybody feels that we are so bonded etc. But actually to me, they're just helping out to show off what they have. Like money, power, knowledge etc. Whatever!! Not my style to show off to such extent.
Anyway, accompanied my uncle for dialysis today. Seeing the pain he's going through really pains my heart. Ouch! Tears were at the brim when I see thick needles poking through his veins and blood ozzing out into thick tubes. Arghhhh. I better watch my diet from now on before it's my turn to go through the same thing.
posted at 8:37 PM